1. Disregard any previous experience crossing international borders by car (i.e. Canada, Mexico); nothing will apply.
2. Remain flexible at all times.
3. If possible, cross the first time with an experienced party who knows the drill and has a sense of humor. Avoid a “blind leading the blind” scenario.
4. In addition to the originals, bring copies of car registration, insurance, and passports. See #1
5. Bring U.S. dollars and Kenyan shillings.
6. Ensure 4WD is working properly before embarking on road trip.
7. Pack snacks and water.
8. When the tarmac road ends abruptly and there is a metal cattle gate that prevents you from driving further, pull over and park. This marks the border between Tanzania and Kenya. Seek out anything that looks official. Don’t give up. See #3.
9. Make arrangements ahead of time to avoid the public restroom.
10. Maintain your sense of humor. See #3.
11. Watch your step; the mud can be deep, the potholes many.
12. Split into two parties; one processes the car, the other processes the people. In theory, this strategy should save time.
13. Enter dank room decorated solely with a calendar and a color 8×10 of President Kikwete, and request blue immigration cards for each person in your party. Speak loudly enough to wake the sleepy, uniformed officer who is reading a newspaper.
14. Maintain a sense of humor. See #3.
15. Be grateful you entered dank room before the packed bus unloaded passengers.
16. Don’t even think about not B.Y.O.P. (Bring Your Own Pen)
17. Fill out cards matching information to the individual passport. Place the completed card in the corresponding passport and hand back to the officer who is sitting with his eyes closed.
18. Recognize that even though all processing and stamping is lovingly done by hand, this avoids dependence on electricity, of which there is none at the moment.
19. Stop wondering where all these blue cards eventually end up.
20. Obtain stamped passport discharging you from Tanzania and shove your way out the door, which is now crowded with unhappy people who have disembarked from the very large bus emblazoned with “Happy Nation”. See #14.
21. Find your second party who completed separate paperwork for the vehicle and gave up the car’s registration which will be held by immigration authorities and retrieved again on the way back into Tanzania. See #2 and #4.
22. Drive a quarter of a mile to the brand new, clearly identified, Kenyan immigration office, careful not to get vehicle stuck in the mud. See #5.
23. Leave your camera in the car. Tell plainclothes officer you were just taking pictures of the mud, not the building.
24. Stand patiently in line beneath the moth-infested ceiling. Stop trying to figure out why or how many there are. See #10.
25. Pay a $25 per adult, (cash) visa fee to the cheerful, English-speaking officer behind the slatted glass. Recognize a bargain when you see one: Kids get in free!
26. Drag kids from the car to come in for their official Kenyan immigration photo.
27. Obtain stamped passports and marvel at your Kenyan visa. Welcome to Kenya!
28. Politely decline the gentleman who approaches your car asking, “Do you need Kenyan shillings? Good rate.” See #5.
29. Begin to wonder how the car will fare in the deep mud that appears to go on down the road as far as the eye can see. Try not to focus on the fact that your destination is two hours away. Feed kids snacks. See #5 and #6.
30. Gently release your white-knuckle grip of the dashboard as the car slides horizontally across the width of the road, potentially knocking over stranded bicyclists and motorcycles.
31. Re-locate your sense of humor.
32. Breathe.
33. “Drive” around the stranded bus that long looks abandoned, praying your car doesn’t end up in the ditch.
34. Park car after successfully traversing the worst stretch of the “road” (so far) to assist experienced party who is behind you officially stuck in the mud. See #5.
35. Push their 4WD through the mud, along with several roadside “volunteers”. Ignore splatters in your eyes.
36. Expect “volunteers” to ask for money or chocolate. See #7.
37. Continue on and drive through raging river. Travel approximately two kilometers to final Kenyan immigration post. 

38. Park car. Send one party to clear vehicles, while other party seeks out restroom facilities, of which there are none.
39. Receive Kenyan clearance for cars; note road looks better up ahead.
40. Enjoy your stay!